Sunday, September 2, 2012

A little about my school journey

Hello everyone!
I have decided to tell everyone about my struggles with school including high school and college. I’m not sure where to begin so I guess I will start with this J before I got pregnant I attended a well-known high school. I continued to go there during my pregnancy and after I had my daughter. Being in a high school that was full of well snooty people while you are pregnant isn’t exactly easy. I went from good grades and well liked to ok grades and a few friends so after I had my daughter I entered my junior year of high school I thought everything would be good but after a while the rude remarks from students and teachers got to me on top of having a daughter who was constantly sick and the doctors couldn’t figure out why for a really long time. So I finally asked my mom if I could go to school at home through ECOT I knew about this online school because I had two cousins graduate from ecot. So after I talked my mom in to it and she talked my dad in to it she signed me up to start ecot in the process of me switching schools my public school decided to press charges saying I was being truant and I wasn’t. So I had to spend 30 days on probation until I could show the judge I was doing my work at home and getting good grades once I did that I was free. I thought going to school at home online was going to be so much easier when the truth was it was not going to be easier in the way I thought it would be. I had to try and read and do all of my school work with my daughter with me it wasn’t like going to classes and having to take her to her grandma’s house since I was going to school at home I had to handle it all on my own. Eventually I figured out a good routine and graduated from high school, leaving my friends, school activities, and somewhat of a social life behind was not easy but I got threw it because I knew I had to. I finally graduated high school on time in May of 2008. I knew from there I wanted to go to college. I had always dreamed of being a nurse or at least I dreamt of doing something in the medical field. However when I expressed what I wanted to do to my family they basically talked me out of doing it saying that I would never be able to go to college for nursing. That I didn’t have what it took. After hearing that over and over again I started to believe it so instead of doing what I wanted to do I looked in to other options. I finally found corrections and criminal justice. I saw there wasn’t much math included and there wasn’t a waiting list so I said what the heck I can still kind of help people this way so I signed up at the local community college with a major in corrections. I ended up really liking corrections I was on dean’s list almost every quarter and when I did my internships I received excellent evaluations. However achieving this was not easy what so ever. Once I enrolled in college and started I had family members that told me they were going to help me as far as watching my daughter. Some of them followed through and some didn’t making sure I had a babysitter everyday was a huge struggle and it was very stressful. I even at one point had to go to my local job a family services department and apply for daycare assistance and I did that for a little while. Other than worrying about babysitters I would have to say for me the other stressful part of college was homework, I typically would get as much done as I could while I was still at the school. However what I didn’t get done I would have to do at home. So when I got home from school I would do what I had to do around my house and cook dinner and play with the daughter then get her bathed and in bed and then that’s when I when I would start on homework.  Which caused me to usually be up very very late and then I would have to get up very early so I usually didn’t get much sleep. Red bull became my best friend J those two things were my biggest struggle during my first year of college the second year I became pregnant with my second daughter and  by this time I had a reliable babysitter and my school schedule worked around my husband’s work schedule most of the time. Even though babysitting was not an issue being pregnant at school once again was hard. I was sick and so tired and I was already tired to begin with so I really changed my diet and my schedule and that helped if it wasn’t for my husband I wouldn’t have been able to do it. I was due to have my second daughter during fall quarter so Instead of taking any time off I took courses online that quarter still enough credit hours to keep me full time. After I had her I now had more responsibility and less time. I eventually started again with the cram all of my work in after the kids were in bed. I still did a lot of work at school but I always had studying to do. After my second year was done I graduated finally with an associate’s degree in corrections. I made dean’s list almost every quarter and was an instructor favorite. I felt really good about myself by the jobs in my field were almost nonexistent and in my heart I wasn’t truly happy because it wasn’t what I always dreamed of doing. I enjoyed it yes but it wasn’t a passion. So I plan to go back to school for what I really want to do which is nursing and I can’t wait. I know now I can do it and I wish I had this confidence years ago. So I know all of the struggles first hand. I wouldn’t have gotten through college if it wasn’t for my husband flash cards and red bull J but I did it and you can too!
I would love to hear from some of you that have dealt with struggles while trying to go to school. We need all the support we can get when we are trying to improve our lives by going to school.


Monday, August 27, 2012

Dealing with people who judge

I know I mentioned in my story about how people will say mean things and be quick to judge. Its a very hard thing to deal with and can really affect how you feel about yourself and how you progress in the future. Especially when you are already dealing with so many emotions to begin with. I know personally not only would i get judged and made fun of at school I would also deal with this out in public places such as the pediatricians office. When i would be in there with my daughter I could hear people say rude things like wow look at that kid with a baby that poor baby doesn't stand a chance in life. I would hear things like this daily. I had a family member tell me I would never make anything of myself and that I would just flip burgers for the rest of my life. I would also get comments like don't you know your daughter will be in jail because your a young mom... People really have no clue how the hurtful things they say to you can really affect you. For a little while I let this get me down, I started to not believe in myself at all. I started to give up. However I knew that just because people said these things and felt this way didn't mean that it was the reality of my situation, I knew that I was the only person that could control my future and my daughters future. So I picked myself up put up a thicker wall and said to myself I am going to prove these people wrong no matter how long it takes me and that is just what i did and im continuing to do. I graduated high school even though my own family said I would never do it. I started college and graduated and carried a 4.0 gpa almost every quarter even though everyone said i would never do it. I can tell you one thing proving all of these people wrong was amazing. It was not easy finishing school and starting college and getting good grades but i knew i had to do it. I encourage any girl out there to not be a victim of the harassment and beat the statistics, It may take you a long time to get through school but if you get through it that's all that matters. There are options and assistance out there to help us teen moms so we can finish school and get a higher education. Just put your best foot forward and keep working hard and it will all pay off.

I plan to talk about my struggles finishing school and getting a college education tomorrow :)

I also want to remind everyone coming to read my posts to please comment or email me I would love to hear from all of you and give any advice i can

Sunday, August 26, 2012


Ok, I told everyone i would find a good website about co parenting and I found one. It has alot of helpful information.

I would love to hear from some of you about how you handle co parenting.

Wednesday, August 22, 2012


Okay so far i have heard a lot about struggles with co parenting and an absent father. This has been a struggle for me as well. I'm really curious to know what everyone else goes through with this and what you do to make the situation better. My main struggle with this is that my daughters father was never around and when he got married 5 years later he then wanted to be what i call a part timer and it has been very hard to co parent because i feel resentment because he was never there for her however i try my best to get past this because i know its what is best for my daughter :) I may try to find some websites on this stuff and post them later.
Cant wait to hear from everyone.
also if you are on Facebook go and like my page there Teen Mom Help & Support

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Growing up & things lost

Okay, Day two of blogging.
I'm not sure if anyone will comment on this or not but I encourage everyone to comment. I'm keeping this a safe place. I know I practically had to grow up over night and in the process I lost a lot of friends and had to give up many things. This is usually the hardest part for girls. In my situation I was still able to show horses and be around the barn after I had my daughter so I took pride in taking her with me and teaching her :) Since I was sharing something close to my heart with my daughter the sports that I had to stop playing didnt bother me because I was able to do this. What did you do to overcome some of the disappointment from the  sports/activities you had to give up. Or were you able to continue these?

For me it seemed that majority of my friends stuck around while I was pregnant but it seemed like after I had my daughter and that became my number 1 priority a ton of my friends stopped talking to me and coming around. I did have one amazing friend stick with me through it all and she is a big part of my support system. It was sad to loose so many friends but instead of consuming so much time into worrying about it I leaned on my one true friend and spend time with her and my daughter and we had a ton of fun. And once I met my now husband we spent time doing alot of fun things. I also leaned on my family members. I know now everyone has a strong support system. I learned that its not how many people you have surrounding you supporting you ect. what matters is the people who care for you and love you no matter what the situation is. Those people will be a bigger impact on your life than 20 untrue people could. I also tried to meet some other young moms. Did you loose friends? What did you do to overcome this at such a young age?

I really hope to hear some feedback if you are not comfortable commenting please email me :)

Monday, August 20, 2012

Websites for help

Below is a list of some very helpful websites. Educate yourself :)

Webpage for healthy dating and a resource to help with dating abuse
Website with lots of information on relationships, sex, teen pregnancy
Tons of information about teen pregnancy and prevention
Sex education, Can find a center close to you for prevention options and pregnancy help
Safe page for teen moms to go to for help and support
This website talks about different options for an unplanned pregnancy

Additional Information

In regards to my story. I just want to make any young girl aware that it is not the best choice to hide your pregnancy. There is a lot of prenatal care that your unborn child requires. The quicker your support system knows you are pregnant the longer you have to prepare and decide what is best for you situation. I understand it is scary but there is people you can reach out to. There is blogs like mine, support groups, school counselors, Churches. Keep yourself and your child healthy and happy. I plan to post some helpful websites later including websites on prevention.

Also with my story, I want everyone to know that there is physical abuse and there is verbal/emotional abuse and neither one is ever okay. Don't become a victim. seek help. I will also post some helpful websites for this.

I also want to say that school is so important for your future. It is hard with a child. But there is options. Your local job and family services may be able to provide day care assistance, talk with your family, look into online high schools. Never give up.

I have faith that if we can start supporting young mothers instead of running them down we can make a difference. I truly believe we will see graduation rates rise in teen mothers as well as the number of teen moms that have a college degree.